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0-9 a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z
2 Fast 2 Furious (A-) High speed John Singleton film about street racers. Just as good as the first and unintentionally quite homoerotic. Dumb bad guys.
28 Weeks Later (D) An uncompelling and unwanted sequel that comes across as Americanized and a war metaphor using the infected. Boyle's original is better.
1408 (A) A mind-fuck of a horror flick that features mostly John Cusack getting twisted by a haunted hote room. Has both a heartfelt backup story and chills.
15 (A-) Really strange youth-gone-bad flick from Singapore. Features surreal dream-like sequences, thrillingly bad YouTube like dance stuff, and hot aZn boys.
A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints (B) With an outstanding cast, I only wished the film had more to do than present a moody ambivolance towards subject.
Across the Universe (B) With its Beatles musical concept and stirring visuals, it's unfortunate the non-music parts really drag. Still, it's a very unique, neat film.
Æon Flux (C+) While it captures the visuals of the original, the storyline is less bold and the acting is absolutely non-existant. It isn't as bad as people think.
Alexander (B-) Often boring,
however very visual swords and sandles epic. Love Colin and Jered and the
homoeroticism. Battle scenes are great and gory.
Alien vs Predator (F)
Unreasonably silly, unbearably bad. Too talky for first hour. Only a few
good fights later. PG-13 rating kills it. Freddy vs. Jason anyone?
Aqua Teen (B) Pretty effing sweet, if not really all that epic. Serves the Adult Swim audience well, and leaves everyone else still scratching their heads.
American Wedding (D+) Mostly awful climax to the trilogy. Parts are very good and include Jason Biggs' bare behind. The rest is long and agonizing.
Another Gay Movie (A) Brilliantly satires the state of gay flicks by using camp, spoof, and outright shock humor. Alot of fun and yet finds a way to be touching.
Anything Else (A) Wonderful Woody Allen film featuring the whining of Jason Biggs and his distructive lover Christian Ricci. Very funny and sharp comedy.
Bee Movie (B+) Funny, if frantic, Seinfield take on bee culture. The animation is stunningly beautiful, but the storyline hits a huge courtroom snag midway.
Big Fish (A-) Crowd pleasing yarn about a son who thinks his father is full of it. We go through the mystical adventures that are filmed and acted so well.
Birth (B) A solid puzzle. Kidman and Bright stare each other down in a pedophillic tragic love story. The only question remains is do you believe?
Blade 3 (C+) Wesley gripes, Jessica strips, and who's that poor man's Jason Lee anyway? HHH is great, but film is pretty redundant. Drake is kinda cool.
Blood and Chocolate (F+) Underworld with less action/more romance. Really cheesy, dull, and at times cringe worthy script. Not like book. Furries will love it.
Bridget Jones 2 (C) Pretty
bland romantic comedy that mimics the first. Only high points continue to
be British accents and Hugh Grant who barely shows up.
Brokeback Mountian (B+)
With a great backdrop of Wyoming, Ang Lee uses some great performances to
tell a tragic gay friendly love story. Worth the hype.
Catch Me If You Can (B) Leo and Tom act circles around one another in this Speilberg con man flick. A hint repetative, but most of the time is quite cool.
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle
(A-) Drew, Lucy, and Cameron are back in an even more highly charged campy
crime caper. Nice Demi. Better soundtrack!
Charlie & Chocolate
Factory (A+) Tim Burton reinvisions a classic and produces a visually
perfect, stunningly timely, and darkly mischievous film.
Clerks 2 (A) Quite funny
and surprisingly tenderhearted. Elias is adorable as are Jay's antics.
More of a cohesive story than original film, but still stellar.
Club Dread (B-) Sometimes
unbelievably funny, this Murder Mystery Dinner Theatre at Club Med is not
quite as good as Broken Lizard's "Super Troopers."
Chronicles of Narnia 1 (B+) Visually it's quite pleasing. Features surprisingly great acting from the children. The Witch isn't witchy but bitchy and ending is meh.
Conversations with Other Women (A) Solid and slick with the split-screen use, both actors really sizzle. Nice way of taking a basic premise to new limits.
Corpse Bride (C+) Unfortunately this Nightmare Before Christmas-like Burton film just didn't grab me. It looks nice, but doesn't play very well. Meh.
Da Vinci Code (D+) Bloated self-important and features very little acting. Monolouges dilute the gee-whiz coolness factor. Evil Albino monk is best feature.
Dead Silence (F-) Rare is a horror film this predictable, bad, and completely not scary. Vantriliquist dummies turned murders is just fucking retarded.
Dragon Wars (F+) It's as horrible as a Korean made American film could possibly be. With stilted acting, mindlessly dull action, and snake-like dragons.
The Dreamers (A) Wickedly deep, nicely perverse, reminisent of Cement Garden. French bro/sis enchant a very nude Michael Pitt. Their seduction is real.
The Day After Tomorrow (D) Very little interesting other than weather special effects. Too many characters, too stupid dialouge and acting. CGI Wolves?
Elephant (A) Uses long tracking shots and teen non-actors to put you in a place where a Columbine-like incident is unfolding. You sympthsize with both sides.
Epic Movie (C+) Another kind of spoof film that misses as many jokes as it lands. Some scenes are really crafted well, but the slapstick and sex falls way short.
Enchanted (B-) When animated Disney sugary goodness meshes with real world crassness, it's very funny. But that's about all this film knows how to do.
Eragon (F) Dreadfully cliche fantasy film about a young dragon rider. The film couldn't be any more boring and laughable and is a serious waste of time.
Fast and Furious 3 (B+) While the newbie lead stinks completely, Tokyo, the bad guys, drifting, and even Bow Wow keep this installment pretty fresh.
Final Destination 3 (B-) As gruesome or more than the second, it adds a new quirk to the premonitions that keeps it fresh. Acting remains biggest weakness.
Finding Nemo. (A) Very funny, typical Pixar movie set under the sea. Not that fond of the Sharks and not into the "looking for something" movie concept.
Finding Neverland (A+) Outstandingly solid piece about the man who created Peter Pan. Sizemore and Depp are amazing. It made me fucking cry!
Fred Claus (B+) Quite
funny if nerotic Christmas flick about Santa's brother Fred. Both Vaughn
and Giamatti shine but it's Spacey that takes the cake.
Freddy vs. Jason (C) Not
a fan of the genre, I still reconize the significance of legend vs. legend.
Very sweet old school gore. Mostly dumb dialouge, ending.
Fogi Is A Bastard (A) Very solid gay film about a rock star and his most loyal fanboy. At times so beautiful, others so bleak. Lots of tasty visuals as well.
Fuck (A+) A very halarious "documentary" about the word, its origins, uses, and impact on American culture. Great commentators and animation as well.
Get Smart (B+) A very funny and loyal adaptation of the series, Carrel is great. Even better are the secondary characters. Ending is rather anti-climatic though.
Glue (D) Oft out of focus, lacking in the title subject matter, this coming of age drama about two boys and a girl is far too aimless and improv to be worthwhile.
Godsend (C+) Partly creepy,
mostly just dumb high concept cloning kid movie. Kid and De Niro great, parents
godawful. Best left for a rental.
Grind (C+) Kind of enjoyable
sk8ter boy comedy similar to OutCold and snowboarding. Probably good for
a rental. Sketchy plot and assholic idols.
Grindhouse (Planet Terror:
A, Deathproof: D) Retro homage to exploitation flicks pair amazing zombie
flick with truly terrible car chase monotony.
The Grudge (D-) Poor story,
characters you don't care about, cheap Dolby Sound Scares™. Good points
are the kittyboy and setting.
Halloween (2007) (B-) Taking a pretty good thrashing to the slasher film, Zombie gives us a young Michael Myers, in-jokes, and Malcolm McDowell. Ick.
Hannibal Rising (B) While it will disappoint many, I actually found the prequel to be charming for most of the film. It does suffer from trite action ending though.
Harry Potter 3 (A) A
brilliantly complex fantasy that is beautiful in every way. Better acting
and better effects all around. I miss the professors, mean Malfoy.
Harry Potter 4 (A-) Character
development takes lead over lame wiz tourney plot. Voldemort kicks it up
a notch. Weasly twins nearly steal show.
Harry Potter 5 (B-) Horribly
paced and lumpy, still manages to maintain the magic. Characters are
expanded, some are amazing. But really limps towards end.
Hero (A+) Absolutely stunning Chinese film starring Jet Li as an assassin who does away with three others. Every scene is perfect and immensely pretty.
A Home at the End of the World (A-) Heartfelt, character driven, complicated love story. Colin and Dallas give perfect performances. A bit manipulative.
House of Flying Daggers (C) Filled with equally beautiful images as horrendous acting, Daggers cuts to the bone with lots of action and too many doublecrosses.
I, Robot (B) Solid futuristic actioner starring a funny Will Smith. Feels a bit cramped, however, mish-mashing so many concepts into the film. Nice ass Will.
Indiana Jones 4 (A) A worthy long awaited sequel to the original series starring a well aged Ford. I'm very impressed with action/story, less so with Shia.
Irreversible (F) A assbackwards revenge flick who's main concern isn't telling a good story, but to punish viewers. Highly irritating visuals, sounds, everything.
The Jacket (B) Brody is a stellar centerpiece for an otherwise slightly off story about a guy who may be crazy or may be dead. It's dark psychological horror
Jeepers Creepers 2 (D-) Horrible horror film that produces great creature effects but no chills. The cast is beautiful, but mostly shirtless homophobic teen boys.
Jesus Camp (A) A hauntingly fresh documentary about Pentacostal churchs infusing militant beliefs in their children in preperation for a renewed Holy War.
Julien Donkey-Boy (F-) Very much unwatchable film about a bizzaro family, one who is skitzo. What truly makes it terrible is the Dogme film societies rules.
Just a Question of Love (F) Hatable cliche gay made for TV flick. A guy who won't come out, whose partner outs him, and how many times they can break up.
Kill Bill: Volume 1 (B+)
As an exploitation flick, it really works best. Hyper action and over the
top visuals provide a very fun ride. Then again a little vapid.
Kill Bill: Volume 2 (D-)
If the movies were re-edited back together, it would have been better. Boring
and mostly unenjoyable, its a dialouge ridden mess.
Kung Fu Panda (B+) While this kid flick really is only a two joke movie (fatness and karate), Dreamworks has animated something amazingly beautiful here.
Lady in the Water (F) M. Night completely fails in this nonsense fairy tale about a mermaid. Script is extremely pokey, character stink, and it's filmed bad too.
Lemony Snicket (B) Repetative, but mostly enjoyable dark comedy featuring cute orphans. Jim Carrey is great, but it's the kids that actually run the show.
The Libertine (C-) Dreary, long winded, and often laughable period film where the only bright spot is Johnny Depp. As taboo as it is, still seems cleaned up.
The Little Vampire (B)
Impressively great dark style children's film. Rollo Weeks and Anna
Poppawell excell in a story that features nice mythos and vamps!
The Longest Yard (D) Only
occationally funny, this Adam Sandler/Chris Rock prison and football comedy
features sexist, homophobic, and racist jokes galore.
Lord of the Rings 3 (A+) A fitting, but emotional end to the perfect trilogy based on Tolken's classic books. Every character is great, every scene is fabulous.
Lust, Caution (A-) A challenging Chinese film about a woman who infiltrates the bed of a powerful politico. Maybe too long/complex. Uses torrid sex to sell.
Marie Antoinette (C) After an hour, all the plush and charm wears off and you realize that this flick isn't as good as Sofia's others. Kirsten nudity abounds.
Master & Commander (B-) A mostly worthy old-fashioned navel flick, but the midsection could have used some serious work. Lots of sweet looking boys.
The Mist (D-) Terrible acting, sub-par CGI creature effects, ad-libbed script, all lead up to a supposed "shocking" ending. Still, it does occationally not suck.
Millions (B+) Amusing family film from Danny Boyle? Yes! Two Brit lads find stolen money and spend it. Adults characters suck, plot not that interesting.
Mr. & Mrs. Smith (B) Pitt/Jolie do characters they play best. Plot is slow to start but does like all good hitmen find it's mark. I think Liman can do better though.
The Mudge Boy (C-) Mostly uninspired and uneven farm boy drama. Every character is cookie-cutter making only Emile stand out. A few painful scenes.
Mysterious Skin (C+) Bold and sometimes powerful film about young molestation. Muted acting and episodic nature screw it up. Levitt truly surprises.
Nobody Knows (A) Truly astonishing tale of 4 kids having to live on their own when mother abandons them. Surprisingly upbeat, but still quite chilling.
The Omen (2006) (F+) With truly wretched acting, only a few cheep thrills, and a serious lack of Damian drama, this remake belongs in the dollar bin.
Palendromes (A-) Quite daring, but yet not wicked enough. Many actresses play Aviva which is neat, but pitch black comedy is severely lacking bite.
Pan's Labyrinth (B-) A strangely dark and gritty movie mashup of fantasy and war reality. The villian makes the movie, but the fantasy certainly shines too.
Pecker (B+) One of John
Waters less controversial films pits Edward Furlong against the world as
his photographs popularize a small town. Still fun/dirty!
Peter Pan (A-) Amazing
effects driven retelling that puts the bite back into the dark children's
fantasy. Tink and Hook excell while Wendy drags it down.
Pirates of Caribbean. (B+)
Pretty gay actioner starring Depp and Bloom! Stupid monkey and sidekicks
and length try to pull it down. But it's still stellar! R!
Pirates of Caribbean 2. (A) Even more gay actioner fun with Depp and Bloom! This time it's bigger and better. I absolutely adore Davey Jones! R!
Pirates of Caribbean 3 (A) Captian Barbosa steals the show in this epic showdown psudo end for the trilogy. Long, yes, but epic in every possible way. R!
Pizza (B) Surprisingly decent teen fare about a chubby girl who rides with the older pizza guy. Each learns lessons about themselves as expected, but it's good.
Pretty Boy (C) Truly average Euro-Gay trash film that exploits the exploited. Occationally vivid and brilliant with performances/visuals, but often just dumb.
The Protector (D+) Hard to rate considering it's a Weinstien butchered job. Still, the original probably only had Tony Jaa's fighting to carry it anyway, right?
Ratatouille (A) Pixar's produced a visually outstanding film about a rat who can cook. With a solid plot, well defined characters, and just enough laughter.
Resident Evil 2 (D-) Everything interesting about the first film is gone here, so all that's really left is Milla looking all hot battling Umbrella and a weirdo mutant.
Resident Evil 3 (B) Very video-game like, the third trades has obvious action pieces. The more Milla the better, but it still lacks the interesting story as the first.
Rush Hour 3 (A) However unnecessary, the third outing for Tucker and Chan is still blazingly funny. While empty calories, the action is also pretty well done.
Saw (D) Dark demented
film that sucks all the life out of you. Nice puzzler, but overacted and
quite boring. Overuses flashbacks.
Saw 2 (F+) Poorly acted
save for Jigsaw, obscenely abuse of flashbacks. Not as clever as the first.
Most expensive CSI episode ever!
Scary Movie 3 (A) Very
slap happy halarious spoof of mostly "The Ring" and "Signs." Out with
most of the perverse humor, in with the traditional spoof.
Scary Movie 4 (D) Replacing
sharp wittyness with mostly slapstick, Zuckerman's second sequal in the series
falls flat. Nevertheless a 5th film is underway.
Shaun of the Dead (C)
Only mildly satisfying brit-horror-comedy. Best parts in the trailer. A nice
soundtrack and gorish effects aren't enough to salvage it.
Shortbus (A) Using extremely graphic real sex, this film explores connections adults make or don't make with each other. Super-pretentious to be sure.
Shrek the Third (A) Another great adventure for the ogre and his ever growing assortment of pals. Beautiful and quite funny, you just can't go wrong here.
Sin City (C) Stylish yes, and features great characterization. The problem with the ultra-violent comic book come to life is that it is boring and monotonis.
Simpsons (B) Adequate,
if not epic. Fans of Bart will be the most pleased, as the under-achiever
gets the most story next to Homer. Plus a nude scene.
Sleepover (D-) Occationally
funny, but otherwise negative message infused teen-girl comedy. Vanity,
self-image, cliquish and bad. Sam Huntington was nice.
Sky Captian (A) Very classic
adventure film featuring a delicious cast and story. The glossy gimmick while
distracting at first works very well. Very nice.
Snakes on a Plane (B) Despite the completely cheesy premise, perhaps in spite of the internet hype machine, Samuel L's flick is better than it has a right to be.
Stardust (C) Mostly bland
and middling adult fantasy fare starring many you won't particularly enjoy.
At times very funny, and visually enchanting, however.
Star Wars 3(B-) Extremely
hot Anakin transforms into Darth Vader in a uneven, but action packed episode.
Obi Wan does indeed save the galaxy from doom.
Soul Plane (D+) Sometimes
funny spoof of Airplane! that would have been made better by Dave Chappelle.
Too short on story to be an actual movie.
Spider-Man 2 (D) Dreadfully
boring build up to one long CGI infused scene. Acting and script neglected
for just another cool effect. Nice cameo though.
Spider-Man 3 (F) Completely
hatable what between the annoying MJ, emo Spidey, and shitty tacked on Venom.
Maybe the series will be dead for a while.
Spun (B-) Brutally wicked
tale about the addiction to crystal meth. Mutually sick, twisted, and fun.
Not as good as Requiem for a Dream. Get unedited version.
Storytelling (D) Unlike other Todd Solondz, this isn't that controversial. The two stories that it's made of are uneven, drull, with very little to actually say/do.
Summersturm (B) Very good gay flick about heading off to a rowing competition. Sensual visuals and a compelling realistic storyline really help the acting.
Superbad (A+) Immesely funny and yet actually poignant coming of age film featuring a trio of boys having sexually charged misadventures. I am McLovin!
Taboo (C-) Gay samurai doesn't work well with likely bad subtitling. More of a potboiler than martial arts flick, and it lacks a lot of sensual oomph.
Terminator
3. (A+) Worthy sequel to one of the best action movies of all
time. May have better sequences than Matrix: Reloaded. No Edward Furlong.
Team America (A)
Very funny, vivid picture about puppets engaging in sex and world police.
Anti-left wing and right, Matt and Trey do it doggiestyle.
Thank You For Smoking
(A+) Amazingly funny farce about Big Tobacco's leading spin man. The entire
cast excells including Cameron Bright for once.
This Boy's Life (D) Some call this DeNiro/DeCaprio flick a classic. I find it a truly dreadful piece on de-pussifying a defiant kid. Overacted and sooo long.
This Filthy Word (A) John Waters is a fucking genious, and this documentary is part history lesson on his film career, part stand up comedy act. Nice!
Torque (F) Hyper dirty
biker boy movie that's painful in completely every possible way. 2 many
characters 2 many bad lines of dialouge. Completely awful
Total Eclipse (B-) Leo's
hyperactive gay role is a period piece about poets. Runs very well most of
the time, but crashes and burns at end. Leo nudity!
Transamerica (B) Surprisingly well done film about a transgendered woman and her unexpected son. Very well acted, even though some scenes flake out.
Troy (C+) Epically vapid
swords and sandles flick where motives are unknown and characters go undeveloped.
Still, it DID show some Brad Pitt nudity.
Ultraviolet (D-) Poor graphics, completely incomprehensible storyline, and some lame acting almost completely sink an action packed, sci-fi bonanza.
Underworld (B-) Style
over substance vampire vs warewolf flick. Heavy on gunplay and blue filters.
In the vein of Blade and Matrix, but with no heart.
Unleashed (A+) While it
may have too much sentimentality for action fans, Jet Li's transformation
into a dog and back again is perfect in every way.
V for Vendetta (A) As slick and stylish as V is, what's more exciting is how great of a story is told. Characterization is as impactful as its message. Nice!
The Village (A+) Outstanding genre bending and creative effort from M. Night. Very tricksy, well woven tale. Great cast, great camera direction. Amazing!
Waiting... (A) While this resturant comedy takes a while to get going, eventually it's balls out madcap funny, quite literally. Honest and relentless. See it today!
Walking Tall (C-) The Rock was better in The Rundown. This is a bland, unbelievable actioner that is cut up and too short. Johnny Knoxville steals the show.
Wanted (D-) Hyper-stylized and underwelming, this fuck the world gory flick is about assassins who can do amazing things. But its wooden and irritatingly bad.
War (D) Jason Stathem
and Jet Li in the trailer were allegedly going to fight. They don't
really. The film is more about being a bad Asian ganglord film.
Wedding Crashers (B-)
While the fixing of the plot at the end nearly collapses, the raunch and
comedy sticks. Shameless and silly all the fricking way.
Welcome to the Dollhouse (B-) Bittersweet story of middle-child syndrome as Weiner rebels against her world. Darkly funny, if repetitive and unreal.
Wall-E (A+) A ballsy kid
flick with the bleakness of Earth and lack of dialouge, Pixar does amazing
animation and characterization. I love this movie.
White Noise (D) Cliche
ridden and sloppily edited, Michael Keaton makes faces at static filled TVs.
Thirteen jump cut scares really suck.
Wolf Creek (F-) Lack of
plot, pacing, character development, scares, camera work. This one just blows
it all off.
Word Wars (B) An interesting look at competative Scrabble. While the stories presented are interesting, the way it is filmed is too flashy and nausiating.
Wordplay (B-) Fun if overly sentimental docu-drama about crossword puzzles, their creators, their fans, and their champians. Jon Stewart, Clinton are great!
X-Men 3 (A-) Sure fanatics dispise it, but the endcap to the trilogy is filled with action, characters, and hot mutant on mutant action. Pyro continues to shine!
You Are Not Alone (A+) Outstanding Danish film about really young love set in an all boys school. Equally touching as it is beautiful and taboo. Boylove classic.
You I Love (B-) Pretty odd but solid three-way kind of movie where boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy hits another boy with car, boy likes boy. Really sweet.
Young Adam (D) Rather boring film about a ship hand's affair after discovering a dead girl in the water. Long, brooding, though occationally well acted, filmed.